Poem for Poetry Thursday

I tend not to talk about my poems because I think the words should speak for themselves. But this one is a revision of an imitation poem exercise written last year; the Poetry Thursday prompt, reading poems aloud, helped me revise it.

If you have the opportunity, I recommend recording yourself reading so you get a feel for enjambment and inflection. For me, that's the hardest part of the revision process, getting the line breaks just right.

I have yet to read this one to my husband ... maybe tonight!



What Mommy Wants

I want a pair of Candies'.
Make them cheap and tacky.
High-heeled wooden stilettos
(stiletto, from the Italian word for dagger),
white-leather-upper with silver studs along the sides.
Open toed pumps, with just enough wiggle room
for my toes painted "No, I'm Not a Waitress" red.
I want a pair of Candies'.
Make my legs curvy and dangerous.
I want to strut down the street
in a pair of Daisy Dukes and a halter top
past O'Buster's fruit stand,
past Coffee Time donut shop with its real cream bismarcks
and apple cider crullers, past the construction site
and morning commuters at the train station.
I want the hard hats on break
to drop their coffees and shout
"nice gams!"
I want women to take one look at me and think
here comes trouble.
I want to be a tawdry wench,
the kind of woman mothers warn their sons about,
the kind that makes a priest give up religion.
I want my husband to strip me naked
bend me over
leaving on just my Candies'
as if he were cheating on his wife
and getting away with it.



Copyright 2006 January G. O'Neil